Love of the Unforgiven
by chris locke
Summary: Jack has been kicked out of his tribe, with nowhere to go. He's hurt Ralph too much to go to him. Right? Jack/Ralph
1. The Beach

**Disclaimer: William Golding owns everything. The story, the characters, my soul, etc. Well...not the slash...but you get the picture :)**

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The night air was slightly cool, and a wet breeze blew from the south. Ralph sat on the beach, his hands in his lap. The tide came in and washed over his feet and knees. It was warm.

Every star in the universe shone down on him, and the moon was full. It reflected on the ocean, giving everything a silvery glow. Ralph took a deep breath and tilted his head back.

"Ralph."

He jumped at the sound of his name. His hands flew out and onto the sand next to him.

There were light footsteps behind him. The hairs on his neck raised and he dug his fingers into the sand.

"What do you want?" he asked, his voice even.

The person sat down just behind him without speaking. Ralph asked again.

"What do you _want_?"

Suddenly, something touched his shoulder. He jolted forward, toward the ocean. The tide came up and washed over his hands.

He whirled around. Jack stared at him blankly. His spear sat behind him.

"A little jumpy, aren't we?"

Ralph sat back into the water, it soaking into his shorts. His hair was in his eyes, so he brought up his hand to brush it out of his eyes. "Why are you here?"

Jack looked back at his spear and then at Ralph. "I'm not here to kill you."

Ralph let his eyes leave Jack's face. The taller boy was slender and muscular, and he sat cross-legged on the sand. His face revealed no emotion, but something was going on behind his eyes. There were bruises on his arms and a cut on his chest.

"That doesn't answer my question."

"You hate me, don't you," Jack said. Ralph's mouth opened in surprise. Jack looked back at his spear.

"Jack, what are you doing?"

Jack looked up at Ralph, his eyes pained. "You hate me."

Ralph started to stand. Jack reached out and grabbed his wrist. Ralph was pulled back into a sitting position.

"Don't leave…"

Ralph watched Jack's face for any sign of malicious intent. The red-head looked down.

"You hate me," he said again.

"I don't…don't _hate_ you…"

Jack's head jerked up in surprise.

"But _why _are you here?"

Jack's chest tightened. Ralph stared at him, almost curiously. Jack moved his hand along the sand, making a tiny groove.

"Jack, why—"

"They kicked me out."

Ralph sucked in a breath. Jack started to stand. "I don't know why I came here."

"They kicked you out?"

Jack bit his lip. "Isn't that what I said?" He reached down and grabbed his spear. Ralph flinched back and Jack smiled.

"I said that I'm not here to kill you."

Jack started to walk up the beach. His eyes began to sting, and he walked faster. Couldn't let Ralph see him cry. It would be like suicide.

"Why?"

Jack turned around. "Why what?"

"Why did they kick you out?"

There was no answer. Ralph stood up.

"Jack?"

The taller boy made a small noise. His head hung down, and the spear was barely propped up by his limp fingers. His chest shook once.

"I'm their chief…and they just thought…I'm going to kill…" Jack's speech was ragged and choppy. A droplet of water fell from his nose and onto the sand.

"Jack…are you crying?"

Jack looked up. Sure enough, his eyes were red-rimmed and shiny. He bit his lip and the spear dropped to the ground.

"There. I'm not so tough, am I? Just as bad as a littlun, aren't I?"

Ralph started toward Jack. "Why are you here?"

"I thought…maybe…maybe you would be more…I don't know. You'd have no reason to like me. All I've done is hurt you. Why would you do any different to me?"

Jack turned and continued up the beach, leaving his spear on the ground. Ralph watched him disappear into the trees.

"Jack!" he yelled. There was no answer.

---

Jack walked through the trees. The forest was silent. He angrily wiped the tears from his eyes, leaving trails of sand on his face. He was an idiot. What was he thinking, going to Ralph?

He heard his name once, but then Ralph didn't call it again. Jack sat down by a nearby tree. He then buried his face in his hands and began to cry again.

If only Ralph could see how Jack felt. No…Ralph knew how he felt. Jack had stripped him of his friends, left him alone in his own quest for power. Jack had killed Simon. Jack's tribe had killed Piggy. Everything was his fault.

Ralph's face floated to the top of Jack's thoughts. His eyes were so beautiful…each one so deep and soulful. His entire face was warm and kind.

Jack slammed his head back into the tree hard. He couldn't think like that. Ralph was just another boy. But he was just so perfect, so amazing. Jack needed to be near him again.

He picked himself up off of the tree and balled his fists. He was going to go back onto the beach.

No. Ralph said that he didn't hate him, but…there was something in the way he looked at Jack. Something cold. Something…scared. Ralph was scared of him.

Jack made himself walk. His feet didn't want to move anymore, but he made himself go back to the beach.

As he left the trees and came out into the open air, he felt his courage leave. Ralph was still sitting on the beach, looking out over the ocean.

Making sure he didn't make a sound, Jack slowly came toward the fair-haired boy. Just seeing Ralph made Jack's heart speed up. He took slow breaths as he crept forward.

His spear wasn't where it had been. Ralph had it in his lap. The tip was crusted in blood, and Ralph was washing it off. Jack watched him from a few feet behind. Ralph hadn't noticed him yet.

He took another step, his foot sinking a bit into the sand. There were only a couple feet between them. He clenched his teeth and tried not to make a sound as he took another step.

Ralph was scraping the blood from the spear and into the water. He then took the leg of his shorts and used it to dry the spear tip off.

Jack's skills as a hunter let him get one step closer. If he moved his leg, he would nudge Ralph in the back.

As quietly as possible, he knelt down behind Ralph. A smile almost reached his lips as he watched Ralph dry off the spear. His hands were so delicate as they carefully handled the wood.

Jack felt something come over him. He silently moved his arms up and over Ralph's shoulders. Then, as tenderly as possible, he brought his arms together, surrounding Ralph in a hug.

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**Hi people! This is my first Lotf fanfic, and I just LOVE anything to do with Ralph/Jack. Yeah, that's where this is all going. I don't mind a little Ralph/Roger, though ;) *hint*hint***

**Please review! I just love reviews, flames, whatever. Any kind of feedback.**


	2. The Capture

Ralph froze, his hands still on the spear. Jack's arms were tight around his body, pinning his arms to his side. What was Jack doing?

"Jack?"

Jack didn't answer. He leaned forward and rested his forehead on Ralph's shoulder. The tears were flowing freely. Jack had never cried like this before.

Ralph turned around within Jack's arms and faced the crying boy. Jack had his head down, and his arms were limp. His sobs were barely noticeable.

Ralph hesitantly raised his arms. Jack was crying. The fair-haired boy felt that he needed to do something.

He cautiously put one arm behind Jack's back. When that didn't get him killed, he put the other there as well. Jack's back was warm, and his chest shook.

The two stayed in the embrace for a few moments more. Then Jack withdrew, his eyes red.

"I'm sorry, Jack."

Jack shook his head. "No. I'm sorry." He wiped his eyes. "That was too far."

Jack was so different. Ralph had never seen him do anything but kill and control. Now he was…crying…and showing a softer side. Jack was _crying_.

Jack abruptly stood up and started to walk away. Ralph was surprised.

As he walked away, Jack silently cursed himself. Why did he have to do that, damn it? Now Ralph thought he was soft.

Still, Ralph hadn't pushed him away or laughed at him. He had, in fact, returned the hug. Whether that was out of pity or attraction still had yet to be defined, though.

"Where are you going?" Ralph asked from the water.

Jack stopped. Wherever he was going, it had to be away from Ralph. Before he pushed any more boundaries or did something even more monumentally stupid than what he'd already done.

"You don't have any place to stay, do you?"

Jack reluctantly shook his head. His eyes were dry now, and except for some redness there was no sign that he'd been crying.

"Well…maybe you could live with me for a while…"

Jack shook his head again. "Roger started a hunt."

"…on who?"

Jack turned around, anger flickering across his face. "Me."

Ralph saw the anger and smiled. Jack was starting to become himself again. Not that crying boy he had seen before. Jack was angry, and violent.

"Why are you smiling? He's after you, too."

"I know," Ralph said, sighing. "Nowhere on the island is safe. Oh well."

"Oh well??" Jack said incredulously. "Roger wants to kill us and all you say is 'oh well'?"

Ralph looked at Jack pointedly. "What can we do? There's now two of us, against all the other boys. All we can hope is that some of them don't follow him."

"You don't know Roger." Jack said, shaking his head. "He's ruthless. He'll make them do what he wants any way he can. We're going to die."

Ralph stood up and walked to Jack, who had his head down. Jack looked up just as Ralph slapped him.

Jack's head jerked to the side. He immediately came at Ralph with a punch, which was easily deflected.

"What the hell was that for?" Jack yelled angrily.

"You can't give up! You do that and we _will_ die!"

Jack didn't speak. Normally, he would have come up with a sly retort or some comeback that verified his position, but now he didn't have one. Ralph stepped back and sat down on the sand.

"Why…why did you…hug me earlier?" Ralph asked, biting his chapped lip.

Jack's eyes widened slightly. He didn't want to give Ralph the answer. He looked down at Ralph, at his long, blonde hair blowing in the breeze. His skin was tanned, his shoulders muscular. Jack felt a small flutter in his gut watching him.

"Well?"

Jack opened his mouth as if to speak. Ralph shook his head.

"I guess it doesn't matter, if you don't want to tell me."

The red-head looked down. Ralph was so much…so much kinder than Jack could ever be. So much more understanding. Ralph was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

"Jack?"

Jack crouched down to Ralph's level. The blonde's head was tilted up, watching the water upside down.

"What?"

"I feel really stupid for asking. But you seemed really upset before…was there anything going on between…you and Roger?"

Jack shook his head immediately. "Nothing."

Ralph nodded. "'Kay then."

A bird fluttered out of the forest and up into the sky. Jack watched it with a sense of serenity. He heard Ralph take in a sharp breath. A second later, Ralph was standing and pulling on Jack's arm. Jack was jerked up into a standing position.

"What?" Jack asked, confused. He shook his arm from Ralph's grip. Ralph started to run down the beach.

"Where are you going?" Jack called.

Ralph stopped only for a second. "All the birds sleep at night! Someone's coming!"

Jack watched the forest. There was a crunch of a stick from somewhere in the quiet woods.

He blinked a couple times, then started to run after Ralph. He got about fifteen feet when a shout made him turn around.

Roger led a group of boys out of the woods. They each held spears, and each one was sharpened at both ends. Jack's body flooded with adrenaline and he ran as fast as he could. Ralph was twenty yards ahead of him. Roger sent the boys after the two.

"Jack!" came Ralph's frantic cry. Jack watched as a few hidden boys intercepted Ralph and started to drag him by the arms up the beach.

"Don't kill Ralph!" Roger yelled.

"What about Jack?" one smaller boy asked.

"Do as you will," Roger said offhandedly. Jack's heart started to beat out of his chest. He pressed harder, running at top speed until he reached one of the cliffs that overlooked the ocean. He stopped at the slippery pink stone and turned around.

Roger had Ralph and was dragging him into the woods. Ralph's head was limp. They had knocked him unconscious.

Jack watched in panic as the boys descended on him. He tried to get a foothold in the cliff, but his bare feet just slid off the wet stone.

Something hit him on the head, and his vision faltered. Someone pushed him over, and he struggled to keep his balance. A fist connected with his gut while another hit him on the back of the neck.

He held out his arms to stop the flurry of punches and kicks. His eyes came back into focus, and he managed to kick one boy to the ground.

Suddenly, there was something at his throat. He looked back. A boy was holding a knife to his neck.

"I'm sorry, Jack," came the familiar voice. It was Sam.

Jack was about to reply when someone hit him in the stomach. He doubled over and fell to the ground. Then something else hit him in the head and everything went dark.


	3. The Complication

Ralph was cold. Or rather, the ground beneath him was cold. It felt like ice, but as he moved his arm over it he realized that it was stone. He opened his eyes only to see more black. He was frantic for a second. Was he blind?

He tried to reach for his eyes, but his hands were bound behind him. His feet were also tied together with a creeper. There was a piece of cloth across his eyes.

He listened for any noises to tell him where he was. There was no breeze, so he was either in a small space or the deep forest. He was on stone, so he must not have been in the forest. That left one place.

The cave.

"I see you're awake, Ralph."

The voice was cold and dark. Ralph knew it well, from when he had been the chief.

"Roger. What do you want?"

There was a small chuckle. Roger took a few steps closer and knelt down in front of Ralph. His breath was unnaturally close.

"What do _I _want? I don't think you want to know what I want."

Ralph tensed his body. Was Roger going to kill him? If he'd wanted to, he would have done it already. Or maybe he wanted it to be long and drawn out like the sadist he was. Ralph prepared for something to hit him.

There was a small touch on his lips. He flinched back, and Roger laughed. His voice was so close…

The touch came again. Ralph realized with horror that the touch was Roger's lips. He tried to back up more, his back hitting the stone wall of the cave. Roger followed, his hand coming up to hold Ralph's jaw steady.

"What are you doing?" Ralph asked incredulously. Roger was a boy. Ralph was a boy. It didn't work. It wasn't natural. Roger laughed, this time lower and softer. That made it seem almost more malicious than before.

"Isn't it obvious? Or are you just that thick-headed?"

Ralph took in a sharp breath as Roger's lips touched his again. This time it was harder, not as gentle. Roger pushed against Ralph's mouth until he felt that the pressure was satisfactory.

Ralph tried to move out of the way, but Roger's hands came down and held his shoulders against the wall. Roger's mouth began to move, opening slightly.

Then he pulled away. Ralph desperately tried to break out of the dark-haired boy's grasp, but it was futile.

"That was a start," Roger said almost happily. "Next time, though, you _will_ kiss me back."

Ralph shook his head defiantly. "Never."

Roger pulled the blindfold down Ralph's nose so he could look the fair-haired boy in the eyes.

"You _will._"

Ralph felt a small jolt in his side. Roger held a knife to his gut, and he pushed it into Ralph's side until a tiny prick of blood formed at the tip.

"Now, are you going to kiss me back?"

Ralph shook his head again, and the knife was pushed deeper into his side. A small trail of blood ran down his torso.

Roger's mouth touched Ralph's again, more fiercely than before. Ralph struggled, but the knife on his side was causing too much pain to resist. He opened his mouth.

Roger's tongue touched Ralph's lips. When the blade was pushed deeper into Ralph's stomach, Ralph tried to copy, his tongue meeting Roger's. The pain in his gut lessened.

After what seemed like a millennia, Roger pulled away, an ominous smile on his face.

"You show promise."

The knife was taken away and dropped to the floor. Roger's hand came up to the small wound. Ralph waited for Roger to dig his finger into it, but instead the dark-haired boy avoided it. He ran his fingernails lightly up Ralph's side, causing the boy to shudder.

Roger smiled at the reaction, moving his hand again. Ralph tried to move away from the touch, but Roger's hand on his shoulder kept him in place.

Roger leaned in. Ralph closed his eyes, expecting another kiss. Instead, Roger leaned past his mouth and to his ear.

"You like that."

Ralph knocked his head to the side, the back of his skull hitting Roger's temple. Roger made a small grunting noise before pulling back and slapping Ralph across the face.

Ralph's head jerked to the side. Roger took this opportunity to come to Ralph's ear again.

"You're never going to do that again, understand?"

Ralph nodded, defeated. He felt horrible, giving up. But Roger had the clear advantage, and anything Ralph did would only bring further harm to himself.

Roger nibbled at Ralph's earlobe for a second before pulling away. Ralph glared at Roger, trying to convey all of his rage in one look.

Roger's eyes softened for a second at the look before hardening again. Ralph doubted for a second that Roger's expression had even changed.

Roger kissed Ralph once lightly before standing up. He didn't turn around as he left the cave and went into the sunlight.

Roger watched the glowing coals of the fire in front of him. He bit his lip, his mind racing.

Why did he have to do that to Ralph? He silently cursed himself. All he had done was deepen Ralph's hatred of him. All he wanted was for Ralph to realize…

No. Roger shook his head. There was nothing. Ralph was just a captive. A beautiful captive, granted. He was so delicate with everything he did. Roger sighed and sat down on the rocks. Inside the cave, he heard a single sob. He rested his head on his arms and stared at the ground. If only he could find some way to show Ralph that what he was doing was…that there was no other way to show his feelings.

Roger felt at a loss. He was so much in love…but Ralph would never understand that.


End file.
